It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
