How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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