What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
