i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
it was like his penis was on wheels.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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