Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
