hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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