Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
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