if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
