We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
