I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
