my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
He passed out mid-signature
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
