She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
