great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize