College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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