guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
