So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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