So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
we're so committed to being not committed
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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