Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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