So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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