I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Can I color on your dick again?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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