Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You are a genius and a whore.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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