As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
