I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
