I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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