if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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