marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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