I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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