just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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