i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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