but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
