Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
