your thong is hanging out like whoa
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
