She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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