you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
