I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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