at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
