i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
