Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
