Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
