We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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