There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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