"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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