We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
