no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
