Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
