I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
