I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
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