i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
