Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
