I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
The beer is more important than you right now.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
