Buhtt sex?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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