My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
